August 25, 2009

easy babies OR my worth as a mother

GUYS I HAVE SO MUCH TO TELL YOU!

SORRY I HAVEN'T BLOGGED IN FOREVER!

Seriously w/ moving back from DC and going back to law/biz/med/dental school and the trying to help the new wive's club administration get situationed since my reign as prez is over, seriously, things are crazy in a really together sort of way, so I'll catch up way soon but just wanted to say firstly MISS YOU GUYS!

And further more, so embarassing that I haven't blogged for awhile about how EASY-GOING and FUSS-FREE and CLEAN and MELLOW and SMILEY and DARLING and CHILL my babies are and how blessed I fill that they have never not slept thru the night since the day they were born.


Seriously Alivyiah & Tridger are the best behaved five month olds and sleep like such champs and giggle all day and never cry and their poops smell like daisies so when I go longer than two posts without mentioning how easy they are and how everyone comments on how easy they are {since the easyness of babies is a reflection of my worth as a mother and human/cuteness/ability to shop at Anthro} I just don't want anyone to get the wrong eye-dih and think that they aren't still great bc they are the easiest babies in America.

43 comments:

Tish said...

wow! mine too! i knew it was a reflection on my worth as a mother.

Jeannie said...

OH TAMN, I totally know how you feel. I almost hate telling all the other girls how perfect my babies are and were.

Almost.

(:

Crystal said...

I swear you are copying my blog sometimes.... and I love it. Please feel free to use me for material anytime. HA!

Crystal said...

You can also get to be the bestest mommy by saying how your babies are the hardest ever and obviously because the Lord never gives us more than we can handle you must be super strong and stuff.

marcie said...

Don't you find it a bit creepy to call your babies "easy" over and over again?

No? Well, thought I'd ask anyway.

Mhana said...

You are seriously so blessed, but be careful not to call your babies's calmness a blessing because than it sounds like it was a heaven-scent accident that you don't control and your next angelsnuffles might be loud or fussy! Make sure you emphasize that they're good nature is a reflection of YOUR PARENTING and YOUR PARENTING ALONE. I mean its extra hard because you have TWO and because you're practically a single mom {in a righteous way} because your Luverbunz is always studying and working out and stuff. That way your in a rilly good position to offer frownsmile advise to those moms who are struggling to be good mothers. Make sure that, in testimony meeting through the years, you take the opportunity to publically express your gratitude that through your righteousness your children got their Duty to God/Eagle Scout/Young Womanhood Medallion/Honourable Mission/Temple Marriage/MBA. Trust me, it makes those lesser moms whose kids stray feel good about having a goal.

Seth and Peggy said...

Can your babies feed themselves and make their own bottle yet? Have you started IPT (infant potty training...duh)? Do they do the correct signs when they are going? And what about feeding? How do they like solids? Do they ever make a mess or did they automatically know how to eat from a spoon? TAMN, you're doing great, don't get me wrong, but don't get ahead of yourself. Sleeping is just ONE thing that makes a baby easy.

MaryBeth said...

"their poops smell like daisies"

Spell chick sweatheart...it's t-h-e-r-e.

:[

jes said...

you are SO lucky. I wish I was you.

Aundrea said...

Do you read my cousin Tiffany's blog?? Honestly this is her life...although I think she went private so maybe you can request to read her blog and get all sorts of eye-dihs from her!

Brittny said...

Wow, apparently I suck as a mom/am not cute/can't shop at Anthro. Bummer! Oh well, love this kid anyways :)

Kerry said...

Hahaha! Never not sleep thru the night since the day they were born?

So. freaking. true.

I love this blog.

myimaginaryblog said...

This was totally me until a week ago when my baby stopped sleeping through the night. Probably she's teething, maybe she has a cold, possibly she's in a growth spurt, but whatever it is, I sure miss being the best mom on the block (not to mention that I miss my sleep.)

Ashley Ann said...

You ARE so blessed. Cause HF only gives the good ones to the blessed Moms whose prayers were really worthy. He definately reserves those special babies for the pure in heart and has held them back for these last days. The collicky babies are usually crabby from formula. Breast milk solves everything...ofcourse. But, I did feel like you were kind of braggy. I'd tone it down a notch...you definately will not be bish's wife with that ego!

Stephanie said...

Knock on wood. You just set yourself up for a hellion on #3.

cfg said...

Mhana is so right. As her mom, I am directly responsible for every good choice she made. Her brother also made good decisions (those I approve of ) which proves I am an excellent mother. I make a point of reminding my ward of how great my children are, in case they didn't know. When children aren't perfect, it is the mother's fault entirely, or so I hear.

Jennie said...

So, are your babes easy to take care of? I wasn't quite sure if that was what you were trying to get across... can you be more straightforward?

Token Asian Friend said...

Seriously, who wants to hold and rock and sooth a baby? Creepy!

The Boob Nazi said...

Wait, why aren't you the prez anymore? Couldn't they break the rules and make you prez two years in a row because you were so awesome?

Rach said...

Dead on, my friend. I have read this very post a million times.

Megz said...

I know I had hard babies because I drank mountain dew while prego. maybe if I'd switched to diet coke?

WanderingJennie said...

You nailed it today. My son has autism, and can be unruly at times when his sensory issues take center stage. I have had a few people tell me it's because I'm a bad mother that he can't just be quiet and calm and obedient all the time. They are so right. I have always felt that his autism was a direct reflection on my worth as a parent and person.

Again, you lead the way for all of us. I'm pregnant again, and hopefully, if my parenting has improved, he won't be autistic too.

I'm so glad I'm typing this..I could never say this with a straight face, even if sarcasm is my favorite bucket of paint.

Molly in the Jello Belt said...

OMGosh! Denial worked so well for me too! Like I told everyone my baby slept through the night, when actually he woke up most nights at 3:00 a.m. for a bottle, but I just knew the power of positive thinking would make him sleep through the night better than letting him cry it out! If you tell your kids they're already doing what you want them to do, they have to do it to make it so you're not a liar. Pressuring your children using your own honesty is so effective!

I *heart* mindgame mothering.

Hobley said...

wow what a great mom you are! thanks for reminding us how easy and awesome your babies are! i forget how easy babies can be until i read all those blogs written by moms bragging how awesomely easy their babies are!! i'm due this saturday, hopefully my babes rock like yours!

rebekah said...

"sleep like such champs"

Spot on. Apparently most babies with blogger mommies eat and/or sleep like 'champs'.

Dani said...

Do you feed them daisies?

kris said...

Amen to Rebekah's comment. Your word choice ("champs" and "chill" and of course EASY EASY EASY) is so spot on that sometimes it's eerie.

Polly said...

I don't read any mommy blogs (except this one), and I'm starting to feel frowny about that ('cause they must be unintentionally hilarious). I love SSB, but maybe I don't "get it" as much as others do. I'm ex-LDS, so some things are familiar, but others I need to Google (like the Good News Minute). Of course, I've always known that SSB is a parody, but I figured it was way over-the-top. I'm beginning to think it's not THAT over-the-top. Wow...

Little Lovables said...

You should totally market their poop smell and sell it in your handmade soaps and chapstick on Etsy or TrendyIndie.



In any case, thank heavens your kids don't smear poop or make messes, cuz if they did someone might go and call cps on your butt for not being a perfect mother.

yours truly dear said...

omg this is so my sister in like 2 years (hopefully longer than that but of course she wants to be righteous and multiply and replenish the earth asap). dead on my friend.

Mrs. Dexter said...

Every time I read your blog, I think of the wife of a guy I used to go to high school with. And I laugh so hard! It's GREAT!

WanderingJennie said...

Don't worry Polly. I'm not Mormon at all and I love this stuff. It could really be a parody of any religious culture where image becomes this important. I see it EVERYWHERE. Where there are high expectations, busy schedules, large groups of people knowing everyone else's business, and your eternal fate hanging in the balance, you get the "Mommy blog". And behind it, the exhausted, bingeing, dieting, laughing, crying, perfect, terrible, loving, tyrannical, righteous, judgmental, service-loving God-fearing lady, who's got it all together, but could absolutely lose it any second, with one hand holding her scriptures, and the other holding her bottle of anti-depressants. TAMN rocks.

WanderingJennie said...

You know, TAMN, you may not want to post that last one. All I meant to say was that mormon, ex-mormon, or whatever, you can see the humor in these blogs, because the very act of making something as messy as family life look *perfect* is hilarious-and it's usually the religous women who dare to undertake it.

GladysIcanbee said...

W:)W!!! Lurve that the TWINNSIES are such low maintenance...it allows JJWT to fullfil all your high maintenances.

dharvey said...

TAMN you are a shinning example of obedient womanhood. You are a ril credit to the wifes' club and to the church. Undoubtably, youre babys' are easy because you and JJWT have paid a full tith. XOXO -- D.

Jami said...

I swear I know who's blog you're mocking. LOL!! (It so ain't mine, that's fer sure.)

Jami said...

I swear I know who's blog you're mocking. LOL!! (It so ain't mine, that's fer sure.)

Megan Gery said...

i love this post. and i love wanderingjennie's comment-- but for totally different reasons. dead on. both of you.

Kirsten "Fi" said...

Ha! Okay, at least no one can say my blog was the inspiration for this post! I don't even have babies whose daisy-scented poop a mother is compelled to wax poetic.

... but one can always dream ;)

Monique said...

Thanks you for this great blog!

Jensen said...

You know, my first one was perfect like your babies. And then when I was pregnant with my second one, everyone kept telling me that since I had it so easy the first time with my little boy, that the next one was gonna be a nightmare. Well, my baby girl has some attitude (shouldn't all girls know how to give a shout out when they're distressed?) but she is still perfect despite everyone else's "predictions." Seriously, what do they think, I'm suddenly a bad parent the second time around? I hope that these all-knowing people don't try to give you negatives when you and JJWT decide to start "trying" again. Hugs and Luvs!

Laura said...

Wow TAMN - thanks for the reminder of the competitive...oops I mean easyness...nature of being a mom to an infant!

Sarah F said...

you're so lucky!