September 24, 2009

i feel so ANCIENT!

Member how I just had my birthday? Can you believe I'm SO OLD??? What's wierd is believe it or not I still feel seriously about 16 inside.

Know what I love {besides Anthro, Twilight, Cheesecake, damask, HANDMADE, and being adorable}? How much, w/ carefull planning, layer after layer of passive agressive behavior works out in my favor!!

For most big deal holidays {birthday, Christmas, Valentines, Easter, Halloween, spring break, anniversary of wedding, anniversary of dating, anniversary of first kiss, anniversary of first tongue kiss, monthiversary of wedding, monthiversary of dating, monthiversary of first kiss, monthiversary of first tongue kiss...just the important ones} it works like this. I say "I don't want anything." Cutiebunz says "Seriously?" and I'm all "I mean it this time, SERIOUSLY!"

Then, there is only two options.
{1} he ignores what I say and gets what I mean, so buys me tons of stuff that I've recently blogged about. I jump up and down and clap my teensy hands in suprise and delight and blog about how good he is at gifting!

{2} he accidentally believes what I say, which means I pout for a while but is no big dill bc I've already shopped for myself in case of this, so I just wrap up the stuff I got me, take edgy vintage photos of it, pretend he picked it out and blog about how good he is at gifting. Plus then I get apology gifts, usually from JJWT and sometimes from my parents who feel bad that JJWT made me sad!

Bro Covey would probably call that a WIN-WIN-WIN.

Basicly, can't go wrong! best birthday ever.

42 comments:

Kerry said...

Okay, this one really did make me laugh out loud. That IS a win-win-win!

Token Asian Friend said...

Do you ever get apology presents from his parents for raising him that way?

Because that would be a win-win-win-win!

Brittny said...

Hooray! I'm SO glad that you had the best birthday ever. Win-win-win situations are seriously the best :)

mindy said...

tamn, thanks for that sweet blueprint of how to get what you want everytime. it's all in the layers. I love it.

Rachel H said...

You never seaze to make me smile. =) Thanx!

Kathi said...

Total WIN WIN WIN.
Way to go, I am so thankful for your manual to marriage (and getting what I want!)

Love all of your BIG DEALS!

Heather Richardson said...

some might call that a whine-whine-win, but whatev.

Happy Birthday!

Kristina P. said...

We like to celebrate the anniversary of "Remember how I totally was dating your roommate and made out with him all the time in front of you, but then I realized you were hotter and dumped him and decided you were the one I was meant to marry and tongue kiss for time and all eternity."

It's a really special day for us.

Brian and Janette said...

No wonder you feel ancient if you're still feelin' 16 inside! At 16, you basically know all there is to know and can do anything you want. You're invincible!

Kamity said...

Monthiversaries are SUCH a big dill. Glad we're on the same page. Passive aggressive behavior also works wonders in marriage. You are SO 16 inside, TAMN! Bless your heart!

kris and judd said...

So did he pick option 1 or 2? I kind of like #2 more, it sounds like you get more stuff that way, plus some make-up nuzzling which I think probly helps with the whole baby thing!
So did your VT Lyndsi get you anything?

Mhana said...

I don't like the word aggressive to be associated with eensy cutie little me, so I call that tecknique "Passive-persuasive" because I get what I want, but I'm still passive/feminine. But enough of your sycobabbel, WHAT STUFF DID YOU GET?! WHEN WILL YOU BE POSTIN' PICTURES? Oh by the way, I am celebrating the anniversary of WINNING my cutie T-shirt from you.

The Boob Nazi said...

But WHAT'D YOU GET??? I need pictures! I thought you'd be happy with the netflix and pizza. Was I wrong?

Science Teacher Mommy said...

You're right. You ARE 16 on the inside!

Chelsea said...

I like this strategy!

Gentrey said...

Best post in a LONG time.

Jeannie said...

Tamn, You are seriously the smartest woman I've ever known.

Seriously.

kris said...

Ahh, "gifting" as a verb. Well played, TAMN.

Rach said...

Haha! I know it's okay to throw the word "vintage" around like nothing else, even when it doesn't make sense, so it's nice to know that even photos you take TODAY of your birthday presents can be called vintage.

I learn so much from you.

Ashley said...

So, let me get this straight.. You didn't get tongue kissed by JJWT on your first kiss day? I thought all Happy Valley Mo Mo's at least got to the Provo Push on the first date with a guy... OR are you just saying that you celebrate them both when, in fact, they are on the same day? I get it. Good cover.

WhiteEyebrows said...

You fail. TAMN would not know what the complex phrase "passive aggressive" means. (or how to spell it, either)

Trent!? said...

Monthiversaries make me vomit.

No offense.

:)

Angela said...

Everyone's a critic. But I think this is one of your best posts EVER and certainly the best in the past several weeks. Well done!

Kerry said...

Hahaha!

The consistency with which you keep this up is AMAZING.

And, hot new birthday banner!

Little Lovables said...

You have such a wonderful and loving understanding of men and such a gracious attitude!

I swear, we will be hearing you giving a "mother heart" type speach in general confrence in 15 years or what!

SAHM: Surviving Assorted Home Mayhem said...

Okay TAMN, NOW you have officially gone too far! Not with the subject matter, with grammar! All the previous grammar faux pas were adorably TAMN, but this one?

"Then, there is only two options." Aaack! You might as well just start saying "What was you going to do today?" and move to Southern Utah. I think you may have ventured from just plain ol' Utah Valley Mo grammar to full-on redneck! But nonetheless hilarious, of course. ;-)

Jessica said...

Bro. Covey.....LOL

JenniferKaryn said...

how old are you now like 19?

myimaginaryblog said...

I never know what to get for myself. Glad that gifting is your talent! (One of your many talents, I mean.)

Muum said...

oh, I am so glad , I was worried about your birthday after JJWT's post. *(after all, it is ALL ABOUT YOU!!!!!!!!!!)

Chelsea Lauren said...

I'm pretty sure my mother in law is the real TAMN

the Eggett's said...

best post ever!

GladysIcanbee said...

I used to wonder how shallow your deep end is.....then I read your blog this week and twise you've blogged about "passive agressives". wow. deep. I can tell yur getting more smart as you hit your 20s.

Stephanie said...

Wow. I doubt any man would want to get married after reading this. It even makes my head spin.

Dianne said...

The anniversary of your first kiss isn't the same as your first tongue kiss anniversary aren't the same?

Frownsmile.

Maja said...

Friggin hi-lar-ious. I can't even say what was my fav part b/c it was al my fav. Happy birthday TAMN!

Charly said...

TAMN! There's a craft store near where I live (in righteous Sandy--you probably live in the aves shudder) that had your name written ALL over it! They had the descriptions of there products in Papyrus font 'n' everything!

Brandon and Leanna said...

ok, can we puhleeze get a new default song!! i hate this god forsaken song!!!

Ashley Ann said...

Love it!

liz smith said...

Sometimes its hard to remember that you aren't real. YIKES

Cheryl said...

My image of you is now shattered. I thought for sure you waited until the altar to have a first kiss. I'm so disappointed.

Heidi Ashworth said...

So when do we get to see the edgy vintage photos of your gifts? (BTW, I buy my own b-day, Christmas, Mother's Day and anniversary gifts, too. Never thought of taking edgy vintage photos of them, tho. Thanks for the inspiration!)