September 10, 2008

You're Questions: young womens edition

Erin Spenc asked, "What's your favorite MiaMaid activity?"

Love activities! Swear they are always the best ever! Best is FUN service, like makeover nite, which is WAY more fun than dirty service like hobos or urchins.

Vanessa asked, "How do I get my MiaMaids to quit texting during lessons? It's a little distracting..."


Are you even being serious?? Not to be rude, but the answer is as obvious as my hubby is perfect: go w/ the flow. TEACH THE LESSON VIA TEXT. That's what I did last week and the girls love LOVE loved it and its catchyness. Here's my outline:
  • Joy is good, sad is bad.
  • Hzrd in hrzntl.
  • CTRRWHMGC (choose the right, return with honor, make good choices)
  • Keep your voice as high as your standards.
Then we pasted pics of ourselves over the ug chick's in the Strength of Youth pamphlet...who wants a frump staring up at you when your trying to feel uplifted? THEN for the include-everyone post-text activity I taught them the side-step-and-pump-your-fist move for the next stomp. Total win-win bc everyone fills involved AND the tried and true foolproof move gets the subbtle "girlz" action of a shimmy but minus the skank factor--JACKPOT. Remember, "Dance like no one is watching" belongs on your wall, NOT in your behavior.

49 comments:

kris said...

Thnx for writing "young womens."

cheri said...

where were you when *I* was in young womins??

Jessica Steed said...

I love this.
I'm one of your newest fans.
Keep up the nice work. :)

As for the "Dance like no one is watching" belonging on your wall, not in your behavior, is that true for Napoleon Dynamite? He was pretty cool.

Mandy said...

Why didn't I think of texting the lesson? It is SO so So obvious! Thanks for pointing that out to us!

Kari said...

Love your hzrd in hrzntl advice but puh-LEEZE tell me this doesn't apply to spooning, right?

Melanie Rossi said...

A friend of mine just introduced me to your blog and I'm loving it! I love making fun of myself and after reading your blog I'm finding I have a lot to make fun of! I do every cliche thing on my blog that you make fun of! I love it! Keep it coming!

rachel said...

melanie,
tamn isn't making fun of anything. she is so totally for rills.

Anonymous said...

I stumbled upon your site, and love it by the way, but I am not a member of the Church of LDS (small gasp allowed). So when you first spoke of MIAMaids, I thought they were something like Merry Maids – the house cleaning company. As I read on, it was clear these were young women whose minds you were in charge of shaping (small gasp allowed for all non-LDS). Still, I totally bet you could get them to clean your house under the guise of some “lesson.” Certainly they would have a tough time texting while cleaning a toilet. And seriously, you could have them decorate those big, yellow rubber gloves to make them super cute. Just an outsider’s idea.

Kristina P. said...

These are such great tips. I will begin implementing them immediately.

I also like to use a lot of visual aids and props. For instance, when I teach the all so important chastity lesson, I like to compare the girl's sacred flower to a piece of toilet paper, and if they decide to let someone pick their flower, then it's a used piece of toilet paper.

Totally effective, and spiritual.

Whitney R said...

HAHAHAHA, shaping their minds.

I am a Mia Maid advisor as well. New to the job and my first Sunday to teach is this Sunday.

Thank HEAVENS for Tamn!! I'm gonna text during sunday school before my lesson to get them all warmed up.


Kristina.... I don't think I've ever read anything funnier. I'm sitting in the school's library and started LOLing.... A little embarassing.

Lobbie said...

You have such a gift to totally reach people where they are! I mean txting your lesson to the MiaMaids? Geeeenus!!

Reggs said...

This is by FAR, the funniest post so far. I am still crying!!

"who wants to stare at a frump when you're trying to be uplifted?"

Genius, TAMN. Pure genius.

Token Asian Friend said...

TAMN, you used to like skank factor! Remember what your mom taught us? "To catch his eye, skank-i-fy!"

it's me, andrea. said...

Man you're funny! Sometimes I really want to hate you but I can't help totally loving you. It will be an eternal struggle between you and I, and you will always win.

*MARY* said...

You teach the MIA MAIDS?!?! Well, don't worry someday if you continue on your righteous path and pay an honest tithe you will reach the pinnacle of church callings, LAUREL ADVISORY. Be happy you're almost there just one more step. I have a ways to go, I'm still just the nursery lady. I have years of primary to go through until I even get to be the Beehives role model.

RaeLynn said...

My favorite post by a landslide. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I have been an avid blog stalker for quite some time now...your blog most frequently, but many others as well. So I feel the need to come clean. I LOVE your blog! It makes me smile, and usually laugh, every time I read it.

Like Tina, I am not a member of the LDS church. But most of the things that make me giggle are those that I see on many other non-LDS blogs too. Bragging about the hubby, "we're pregnant", my child is the cutest/funnest/bestest of them all, and the holier-than-thou complex that all people of faith seem to have in varying degrees. I don't blog yet (MWOC - married with out children) but I'm sure I'll be just as guilty of all these things when I do!

Keep it up!

Mallory said...

OMG *Hzrd in hrzntl*

That just made me LOL.

rachael said...

I bow to the brilliance of this blog.

Maddy Lucas said...

Okay am I missing something here? I initially loved this blog because it was making fun of bizzare mormon culture, but it seems like most of the readers feel more like we're laughing WITH the TAMNers of the world, when really arn't we laughing AT all the ridiculous moms/young married women who are actually like this? Am I the one who doesn't get it or are they? Maybe I'm just mean or I don't realize the TAMN in me.

Either way, I love clicking on the commenters blogs and seeing the real TAMN blogs, I can't stop reading them they just fascinate me.

Melissa said...

I wish I could text my lessons in RS... but half the women don't even own cell phones! Ugh.

Jules AF said...

Yes Maddy, we are laughing AT them. And we're hoping we never become them. When really, we know we all have a little TAMN inside of us.

R A C H A E L said...

Im my YW's, we have the cell phone fairy, and a way cute and totaly awesome costume with wings, a wand and a super cute basket that the girlz must deposit their cell phones in at the beginning of YW. Then the girlz can totally feel the spirit and such... with out texing it to them, easier for us non-technological girls.

Jillybean said...

I would love to text my lessons, but I none of my Sunbeams have cell phones. I don't think any of them can read either.
You should substitute teach for the Sunbeams sometime.

RatalieNose said...

I am a Mia Maid ie: fifteen year old Mormon girl, and LET ME SAY I would TOTALLY respond to lesson over text!!!!!! You, TAMN, are the world's most AH-MAZING leader!!!!

Unknown said...

jill-I can't believe your sunbeams don't have cell phonz. Do there parents want them to be totally behind the times? My kids are going to have one as soon as they can talk.

Vanessa said...

Out of 133 comments, who knew that you would even pick my question to answer. I will definitely take all those suggestions and implement them this Sunday (I'm sure my bishop will be on board with ALL of them). I was so excited that I blogged about it: http://vschmidt.blogspot.com/2008/09/i-have-arrived.html

And Maddy who commented above, I hope when you stalk my blog, you don't put me in the TAMN category.

Haley said...

i want a hzrd in hrzntl tee shirt, pleeez thanx!

Haley said...

i want a hzrd in hrzntl tee shirt, pleeez thanx!

Anonymous said...

I REALLY like this idea. How about Testimony meeting texting?

Ice Cream said...

"Keep your voice as high as your standards."

I think this should be Next Month's MormonAd poster. =)

Gina said...

Maybe I'm slow, but can someone translate Hzrd in hrzntl for me?

Kari said...

Oh gina, how cute and naive! Hzrd in the hzntl means HAZARD IN THE HORIZONTAL. Lying down together = not chaste and sinning makes Tamn cry! Keep it vertical!

Abbie said...

Fantastic! i am peeing my pants laughing! And a fee more:
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Emmy said...

Thanks so much for asking gina, I was about to ask myself but you saved me! I don't text, its not in my plan (and since we're counciled to be frugle I'm pretty sure its not in the Lord's plan either). Thanks Kari for clearing it up for me! My boyfriend and I are definitely going to have to make some changes, I had NO IDEA the hzntl was so hzrds!

Jacque said...

haha!
hzrd in hzntl

I love it.
Now you need to make a CTR looking ring that says that.

Sherian said...

Luv it! I totally think you should make a new shirt with CTRRWHMGC, I would buy it fur shur!

BTW, when are you gonna make new shirts? I would luv sum more, and to get more of the past ones! Maybe you could make one that says...
"Hunt-un in the mount-uns. Ew!"
You know, for that yucky hunt-n season! That bright orange, super tight shirt would be hot! I think that's the only color I don't have a tight shirt in yet!

Sunny said...

TAMN,

Have you and your girls done any humanitarian service? I just thought you would be really good at putting together some scrappin' kits for those poor women in dirty countries who probably don't even know HOW to scrap. SAD! You would be the bestest at it and you could even throw in some mini-pedi stuff! They would be so greatful!

jg said...

All funny but I am so laughing over the "pasting your faces over the ug chick's in the Strength of Youth pamphlet..." So hiliarious!

EmmaP said...

k - this is one of your best posts yet!!!!!!!

too bad they couldn't just make the boring speakers deliver their addresses via text!!! lol!

Rhonda said...

From an LDS Mom in Connecticut...

Keep up the fun! I am still laughing over the whole texting lesson idea. I am so on board with you on this one!

Melissa said...

HAHAHAHA!!! you are the best young woman adviser EVER!!

they are so lucky to have you.

Alicia said...

I love your blog, it is so funny. I am addicted now.

Jen Ha said...

Hey, what's MiaMaids mean? Can you decode Mormon lingo for me?

The Rowser Family said...

Im New here and this seems like great fun!!!

I Do Faces said...

I went to post a comment for the giveaway thinking "wow, good thig and it's only 4:15pm mountain time" but it won't allow anymore comments!!! AHHH
-Tasia
idofaces56@aol.com

ray-of-freaking-sunshine said...

one of your newest fans! I LOOVE it!

Baylee said...

OH MY HECK!! Could you be any more FREAKIN' hysterical???? I am SOOOOO loving your blog!! :) WHOOP WHOOP!!!

CK said...

I love that you pasted your own faces over the frump girls. What a shweet idea.