December 27, 2008

My Fam Just Got Frumped

Blechy.

Well, they went thru w/ it.

They stuck an oober lame wedding smack in the middle of a perfectly good holiday week full of wii, fo-fur, sassy ear-flap hats and spa GCs galore.

Red flag Ruth is now apart of the fam.

{shudder}

Not like anyone would know that considering THERE WAS NO RECEPTION. Seriously, got married this AM and its all over bc they wanted to "focus" on the "ceremony" meaning they prolly have zeero friends and hate fun.

Bad news: she forced me to where some lame WAY too big of a nasty turtleneck. Good news: got to choose whatever black skirt I wanted which was SO SO SO awesome because she kept reminding me to make sure it was in "good taste" meaning she must of reckonized what she gave me was gross and me spicing it up was her only hope of having any darlingness at the wedding!!! Sooo, came up with this adorable classy #:


Wore some opake tights under it to make sure I was still way modest and since she wasn't going to where a tiara, I figured somebody had to so I got one a mine out. Not to be rude but I was SERIOUSLY the ONLY cute slash fun thing about the wedding IF you can even call it that considering it wasn't even at the Salt Lake Temple.

No registry. No reception. No furry winter cape. NO FAVORS. NO GLITTER.

Guys, she didn't even {pained pity pout} TAN.

AT ALL.

Ew. So gross and sad to see someone at their own wedding actually look like it's the middle of winter.

{shudder}

46 comments:

Alicia said...

Way to spice up the non- wedding! I bet you were the hottest thing`/ topic there! I guess once they realize they made lame-o choices in their wedding day, they can renew their vows with a big bash of a party! They will put you in charge too because you are so awesome!

Melinda said...

She wanted you to wear a black skirt at her wedding?!? I've been trying to give Ruth the benefit of the doubt, TAMN (not that I doubt your judgment), but that's too much. She's everything you said she was. How sad! I hope she only has sons.

Kerry said...

Ick. I'm barfing just thinking about it. You poor thing.

Rach said...

EW! WHO WANTS TO LOOK LIKE IT'S WINTER DURING WINTER??

I guess they're your burden.

Emily's Bloggin' Out!!!! said...

You Have Such Amazing Taste. I can't belive she would even suggest otherwise!!!! And I can't believe she didn't even ask for you amazing skills and talents!!! What a WASTE!!!!!!

Emily's Bloggin' Out!!!! said...

You Have Such Amazing Taste. I can't belive she would even suggest otherwise!!!! And I can't believe she didn't even ask for you amazing skills and talents!!! What a WASTE!!!!!!

Marisa said...

NO RECEPTION?! It's like they don't even want presents. They have totally lost sight of what a wedding is all about. I hope you can endure having her as your SIL for time and eturnity. I admire your pioneer zeal for putting up with so much.

hello, my name is amber. said...

not the salt lake temple?! unbelievable.

Token Asian Friend said...

Oh! Those tights you wore were OPAKE! I always thought they were called fish-net!

Monica said...

All i have to say is that i TOTALLY agree with the fabulous girls above....LAME-O!!!!!!!!!!

Kristina P. said...

TAMN, that skirt seems like it could be worn by a polygamist!

Seriously, I hope you hiked it up a bit and made it super modest but super TAMN-like, meaning super adorable and amazing.

Michelle said...

Ew! I threw up a little in my mouth when I read about her lame-o wedding. She will live to regret it! Poor girl, no fun, no friends or GLITTER, what is she thinking? How will she ever live without 3 rice cookers and 2 toaster ovens that she would have gotten at her reception? And then she didn't get to walk through bubbles on the way out...sad. She joined the wrong family. I would kill to be your SIL!! :) eBFF's (to eternity)!!!

myimaginaryblog said...

Wow, I thought I was a boring old frump but even I had a reception.

(I thought having it at the Springville Art Museum meant there would be decorations enough (in the form of art on the walls,) but the ladies from my ward rescued me from my folly by putting real goldfish in goldfish bowls at all the tables. That's a true story, but I'm not sure why I'm bothering to share it with you, since my recep. was still a pretty sorry sight compared with yours, I'm sure.)

SO sorry abt. the turtleneck -- eeewww! So glad you were able to somewhat save the day with that flirty skirt.

Howertons in Iowa said...

You look Hot with only 107 days to go! Black was a great choice.
Wearing your own tiara rocks!! Your BIL prolly married her cuz he couldn't have someone like u, way bummin so went off the deep end. I'm just sayin.

Chris and Tara said...

Token Asian Friend... you are (dare I say it?) just as funny as TAMN.

Annette Lyon said...

Serious bummerage.

Cheri said...

That is so disgusting. A pasty white bride in pasty white weather??? WITHOUT ANY FAVORS??

Your patience inspires me.

Trent!? said...

If it's any solace, at least she'll NEVER be put in young wominz.

The Boob Nazi said...

She just couldn't have a reception because it would have been NOWHERE near as nice as yours.... She just couldn't compete. Consider yourself complimented.

ukyankoz said...

Mani/pedi STAT for having to go through that, I so totally admire you for being so curageous!! You inspire us all, TAMN!!

(P.S. You didn't talk about her ring - it's totally not as big as yours, right?? As IF!!)

Mary said...

All I have to say is that you better be getting a super awesome homemade/stamped thank-you note from her for totally making her "wedding" awesome. I didn't think there was anywhere else to get married except the SLC temple...weird...

cate said...

It doesn't seem like there is much you can do about her being such a frump, so instead, enjoy being the hot, beautiful, talented, funny, etc. one in the family. No competition!!!

The Bradley's said...

No registry? That means they couldn't put cards in their invites saying where to get their gifts! And without a reception they couldn't send them to everyone they know/used to know/might know/their parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, and bishops know! Where are their posh household furnishings going to come from?!?!? Way to be FRUMPTASTIC Ruth. Sheesh. Good luck baring that burdin TAMN!

Kari said...

No furry winter cape?!?!!!!
Seriously, what the h?!

i have some **gOoD nEwS** to de-frump this icky situation tho....

TAMNers wrote on my fb wall!!!! YEAH, BE JEALOUS EVERYONE! pRETTY much means that i'm her bestEST e-BFF :) :) :)

Kim said...

Love opake tights! They make everything modest and classy!

kt and joe said...

Chica, one time I was a bridesmaid at my ex-roomie's wedding, and WE WORE SKIRTS SOOO SIMILAR TO THE ONE YOU PICKED OUT!!! 'cept fer ours were RED. Cuuuuute!!!! The best part was that the bride picked them HERSELF...talk about good taste! Love love LOVE.

Madddddddy said...

Where in the world did they even get married then?!?!?! You poor thing!

Kamity said...

Whoa, you could fit into a skirt like that while PREGNANT?!?!?!

You haven't yet told us about all the awesome stuff you got for Christmas! Like how your mom found you Wicked tickets!!

Lyndsey said...

You should have a Ruth Spin off Blog! I think it would be hilarious to have then juxtapose (sp) eachother! Maybe you could hold an audition for the rights to it.

Amy said...

this post made me cringe. Literally.

I wish you could post a pic of the turtleneck so we could see how well it went with your black skirt!

CutieFruity/TaylorFam said...

At least now you'll always have a service project. You have all eternity to bail Ruth out of her frumpiness. I know YOU can do it!

kris said...

Ugh. Could your life GET any harder!??! way to purse-a-vere.

kris said...

Seriously.

Allison said...

The only logical explanation is that Ruth must have thought that with you being so preggers with twins, there was no way you would be able to do a wedding totally TAMNer style (I know that's ridiculous, because you've never felt more energetic in your life!) and I think Ruth was afraid to ask you, out of sensitivity to your delicate condition. But the good news is I am pretty sure that about a month after the babes come (to give you time to recover and all), she's going to ask you to plan a big BIG bash - of course it will mostly be for the twins, but she's going to ask if there can be a little bit of a party in it for her.

Oh, it's sooo hard being diplomatic!) I love you, my favorite TBDILE (totally-bestest-daughter-in-law-ever!)

Sarah said...

TAMN, that is such a bummer. You could give them a really special gift and photoshop a tan on her and pretty glitter and stuff.

Shlepn7 said...

Not even a tan? oh the humanity. but here's the good news: I'm guessing you won't have to put up with de frump de frump for 2 long considering they'll prolly move to some lame-oid dump de dump in the mission filled. hopefully BEFORE the feti slide down from above. Who needs her around for that considering she hates fun. I mean, if she even has kids she prolly would have no clue how 2 dress them. eye eee: A TURTLE NECK at the wedding? r u kidding?

Rachel said...

LURVE the mini skirt w/ opaque tights comment...hahahahahahahah!

kris said...

Ew. THAT type of white wedding is gross.

by jill said...

her maiden name wasn't law was it? too weird....

Karen said...

the idea of photoshopping a pic of her w/ a tan and some bling is
1-derful!!!!!

Ya gotta do it. That might her see what she could aspire 2. maybe kick her in the fanny.

Tori said...

just wanted to tell you that I think that you are hilarious!

Kayleigh said...

Shoot. Heaven forbid anybody look like it's the middle of winter. *shudder* I better get on that...oops.

GladysIcanbee said...

I'll bet her "wedding dress" was really just a plain white thing that she can where on her Friday night date night to the temple. Seriously, are the temples beside the salt lake one that perform weddings?

Diane said...

TAMN, my brother married a "Ruth" on the 27th too. It was very interesting.

Cristin said...

How DARE they not get married in the Salt Lake Temple. Very tacky.

Jeremy said...

you guys are so horrible. ALL OF YOU. GET A LIFE! I'm not "blechy" nor "frumpy" or anything like that but i think you ALL are. I can't believe your actually discussing this. and Whoever is writing this blog, I NOW consider myself SERIOUSLY SO BLESSED for deciding to never read this Crap again. You guys are CLASSLESS and need to get lives