August 23, 2010

eNdLeSs rAnDoM tHoUgHtS

SO MUCH ON MY MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIND!!

Am soooo exited to be 27 days preggo! Am too fatigued to do stuff I don't want to but still somehow find enough energy but only for way fun stuff, weird I know, but it's not me it's the baby. {{helpless shrug}}
I've been thinking that if I bet which I don't bc it's dirty, I'd bet I could gain zero ell-bees the whole time if I'm super careful. What diets are good for preggos? Not that I need to, just that I like to. If I took hcg but am already preggy I wonder if my hormone veins would burst. What is the best kind of running shoes? Will Alivyiah have good hair? If I got really into canning would it be hip or too fundamentalist of me?

I swallowed gum yesterday and now I'm scared.

And what should my theme be for Alivyiah and Tridger's 18 mo bday party be??? i do definately NOT want it to be trendy or anything that has ever been done before, EVER. Yet at the similar time, I want all of you to be amazed at my creativityness but I want to act like I didn't spend an obsene amount of time on it, so, toughsies.
Confession: I have a ginormous crush on etsy.
Even though I'm glad me and AngelLoaf are done with our schooling, I sometimes miss being part of a wive's club just bc I was so good at it.
Guys, even though summer and Pal time is ending soon, alot of you've been asking me how to tell if a bikini is modest which I totally get bc it's important to recognize your role as sassy hot not skanky hot. So as I've said before: the way to tell is simple but involves something yucky and gross-sounding that I don't want to type, but as long as its covered your TOTALLY modest. Rhymes with jipple.

40 comments:

Mary said...

Oh shoot. My jipples have been hanging out all this time!

Frau said...

I think your diet problem is solved. All you need to do is swallow more gum and then it will fill up your stomach for seven years and you won't have to eat.

It's like a free version of that surgery that my doctor says I can't have because I'm not really fat. I think it's rude that they come out thinking they know about the human body just because they went to medical school. Hello? It's my body. My body intutition is telling me I'm fat and they should listen to me because the customer is always right.

Kristen said...

WHEW!!!! I was totally concerned that my bikini wasn't modest and I was worried about getting judged, but with your helpful explanation, I know now that my suit is modest is hottest!

Camie Rae said...

I swallowed gum yesterday and now I'm scared.

A.W.E.S.O.M.E.

Christin said...

Thanks for the Bikini tip, it's good to have a definition for "sassy hot not skanky hot"

Tracee said...

cripple?!

Susan said...

I'm so glad you said jipple, and not *ipple... that would have been so offensive!

Diana said...

Canning is way too fundamentalist! LOL My motto is: Why make it when you can buy it? Let other over-their-head SAHMs do all the work while I sit by the pool and paint my toenails. (Not enough in the budget for a pedi. but enough for peaches.)

GladysIcanbe! said...

Glad to know my bikini is modest cuz it totally covers my jipples. I was worried cuz I thought you would have said something it couldn't be something that rhymes with "hong".

Rebecca said...

Your rhyming skills are uhmazing!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry you're so depressed. There really is no shame in getting on medication, you know? Probably best to try a few different kinds at once & see what works best for you.

MarcyG. said...

Dear Seriously So Blessed, I love your posts and enjoy reading every single one. I think your biggest concern right now is ending up in the "loony bin", which wouldn't be good 'cause who would set the example for the rest of us. Until that day comes, and it's a comin', keep doing what you're doing. :-)

Erin said...

Rhymes with jipple.

Rhymes with mularious.

Ru said...

I'm not a doctor (or married to a doctor) or anything, so I don't know if this is an all-inclusive kinda thing, but you may also want to consider covering your rhymes-with-blaireolas.

(Too far?)

Megz said...

I think my hormone veins burst once. Cuz why else would I have cried so much while watching Steel Magnolias?
And my jipples never show because I got some silicone inserts to help with my modesty. You do that too, right?

Jillybean said...

Trying to make sense of that first paragraph made my head hurt.

yourstrulydear said...

i thought it might have been something that rhymed with pagina. thank goodness you didn't say that real world. ew.

Alpha Banners said...

Sooooo glad it doesn't rhyme with "fine china".

And I'd be scared, too, if I swallowed gum. What if the baby sticks to your insides and they have to to a C-Section and you have this way gross scar that your modest bikini won't cover? What then??

Alli said...

Just found this blog! I <3 it. and so glad to know that if my jipples are covered I am totes modest for the missionaries to come over...

Sarah said...

Ripple? And ripple is like another word for cellulite, I think. It's hard to cover all my ripples.

Charly said...

TAMN, girl, you're 27 days preggo and you haven't picked out names yet?! Gees Louise, if you don't stake your claim now, Lyndzii will adopt an Asian baby and beat you to the quickdraw!

Sorry, but kre8iv names are out. For 2011, it's going to be all random foreign words!

(Seriously, I saw this in a naming book at B&N. Only go there for baby books, Twilight, and non-coffee soy frappuccinos.)

Vrai
Orangensaft
Lumière
Trattoria
Johannisbeere
Plage
Due
Gazebo (it's guh-ZAY-bow!)
Andalay
Pamplemousse
Sturm und Drang
Tyrannie

It doesn't matter what the heck it means--in fact, the weirder the word, the better! Whip out your teensy fingers on the Google translate, a'ight?

Dave Lucy & Marley Gurney said...

I love my modest bikini! As long as my stomach and sexy belly button is covered, I can show 85% of my butt cheeks AND 99% of my NEW size 34D bussoms! (really prayed about it and all and felt like bigger meant better for breast feeding) but I would never, and I mean never, dare show my "ripples". Well, at least not 100% of my ripples.... I really love being such a great example. That's why I'm sooo blessed!

Heather said...

I was just thinking about your 18 month birthday party and I defiantly think you should do a Twilight theme. Or even better, a Hunger Games theme. I mean, the twinses 18 month birthday is right before the last book comes out and how cute would it be to let the tykes duke it out in a mini arena made out of those huge inflatable jumper things?

Btw, if you're serrious about dieting while preggo, hcg is prolly the way to go. You know where they get the stuff they put in those shots, right? So if you were already preggo, it would be way cheaper, know what I mean...?

Muum said...

I'm scarred for you too! Hope the gum dissolves from all that super nutritious diet soda you are living on. :)

Unknown said...

I am really thankful that I have been wearing modest bikinis all along. I don't have my ripples cause I am almost as hot as you and don't have cellulite showing, or my jipples showing either. Whew, totally relieved, especially since I spent the day at the waterpark with my in laws who have super important callings. I would have hated to have shamed them.

So, are you enough days pregnant yet to actual have a DIY test stick photo to put as your f/b profile pic with the + showing?

Anna said...

I just want to say I love this blog. That is all.

Laurie S said...

Ruth probably cans, and has a full year's supply.

I've been wondering about Ruth, lately. I bet she'd have some great input about the theme for twins' party.

Unknown said...

Whoa TAMN! I almost got a bad case of ANGINA as my eyes were getting close to reading the yucky word. Totally thought you were going someplace icky with that.

I'm going to grab a DeeCoke so my heart will stop butterflying!

jdb in AZ said...

Are you going to leave up the lactating counter til the next baby hatches, or close the dairy for few months? Your latest post gives new meaning to the term "ripple effect."

erica said...

18 month birthday parties are for insecure mommies.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

OMGOSH, your preggos again!? Awesome!

Fun to LOL over you again.

: ) Paula said...

Erica, that's the reason happy valley ladies are the way they are!

MW said...

We are all amazed at your creativityness, especially in spelling.

Tracy said...

I hope it was at least fruit flavored gum so there was more nutritional value for the baby than like, bubblegum or mint.

Unknown said...

Alivyiah has your ritecheous jeans +pLuS+ JJWT's ritecheous jeans. The only way she wouldnt have good hair is if she did something rilly sinful, like wearing a frump skirt on a first date. And I know youll rase her better then that.

Runner Girl said...

Can't wait for a new entry! So great -- would love to hear more about your brother!

Jenalee said...

Uh oh TAMN! No posts in a week?!!!! Are the preggies gettin you down ( righteous girsl don't get morning sickness) or have you finally admitted defeat and have given up trying to be as cute as Lynzii?

Little GrumpyAngel said...

LOL! this post is one of your most hilarious in the last few months. Honestly. I would love to quote you on facebook about how to tell a modest bikini but I think it will offend some people :-) I know very many hard core one-piecers and they believe in covering more than just your jipples! I might still be sassy and put a link of this post on there :-) hmm-Working on my courage for now... :-)

Rachel B said...

Hilarious. I would love to read a blog about visiting teaching through facebook or texting.

Nancy Mackey said...

I think your blog needs a bit of a diet! ahem... when was the last time you updated your "ABOUT ME" blurb? cut out the old and on with the new!